Well, as the rest of the xp4t-lers are playing Battlefield 4 (traitors!) I have the whole Epoch-server to myself. Okay, except for the zombies. And the AI. Angry bitch AI (from hell). So I made it my personal mission to wipe them from the island. Because, you know, I can.
Here we go.
Oh, by the way: I suck at DayZ. Don’t know why, just do.
(Actually, it’s day two, but I completely forgot what I did yesterday, so … nevermind.)
Spawned at the southern coast, immediately was chased by zombies. Ran along my favorite city (Komarovo – don’t ask), found a bunch of random crap (no weapon, no vehicle). Someone shot at me while I was scrutinizing some abandoned construction side. Found my favorite weapon: THE AXE. Ran towards Balota. More Zombies on the road. Axed them. Ha! Still no vehicle. Used my last bandage. Was eating a lot, too. Made it all the way to Cap Golova, finally found a store. Zombie bit me, broke my leg (WTF?) Crawled to cover. Logged out to ask for help. Then remembered that coordinates would be nice for the rescuing party, so logged back in (also to show off my newly acquired map-reading-skills). While I was at it, I could just crawl around some more to see if I could find something useful, right? Found out that axing zombies while lying down works great, so I crawled further on. Made it down two blocks, was shot by some AI. Crap.
Spawned at a reasonable distance from my body (Drakon). Also: Working Jetski on the beach, yay! Jetskied to Golova, found my body. Just as I was retrieving my stuff, some guy walked up to me and shot me right in the face. Bitch.
Spawned all the way down in Kamenka. Seriously? Right, body snatching it is. STILL no vehicle. Choppers though. Sadly flown by AI. Being the only target on the server sure sucks.
Spawned … uhm … where the hell am I? Solnichny. Right, forget the body. I can always find new random crap. And I did. Also: Axe. And: no vehicle. Got the suspicion, that those 700 vehicles advertised on the title screen are all parked in one big parking lot in the center of the map. Or something. More zombies coming, axed them. Got bitten. Crap. Ran around aimlessly in the landscape, made it to “the factory” and then to Nitzhnoye. These cities start to look all the same to me. Could be because I am seeing grey all the time. Still no stuff. Down to the last bandage. Some AI shot at me again. Bleeding.
Slowly but steady. Not good. Everything turns (even more) grey as I am down to 3.000 blood. Ah, well … ran aimlessly around looking for a vehicle (guess what!) or bandages or god forbid blood bags. Entered a farmhouse, indeed found bandages. 2.800. Axed some more zombies. Saw two guys with weapons sneak around the corner. Snuck up behind them (as I actually wanted to die) and axe-murdered them. Seriously? Why am I still alive? That was just awesome! AI shouldn’t look surprised. Took the assault rifle off one of them – no blood bags, down to 2.500. Started fainting a lot. Walked up to “lumber mill”. Zombies. Crap. Switching to the axe would mean to give up the rifle (and take too long). That’s just stupid. Shot like four or five of them, but guess what: they just kept coming…